Friday, August 19, 2005
The weekend is finally here
at last
each week seems to be so tiring
and sianz
its not tiring in the physical sense but more of the mental sense
why? cos the prelims are drawing ever nearer
and the stress is building
hist mock, paper 3 will not be good, paper 2 should be passable
entire week was more or less focused on history
i must say that i dun think i can keep this up much longer, this routine is killing me
its become school home slack nap study sleep school , repeat repeat repaeat
in my heart its still so troubled, just cant throw aside other thoughts and focus..........
i feel Vexed, perplexed for some unexplainable reason........
walkdown yesteryear
eve of good friday 2004, a boy walks out of the classroom in a college in singapore, he sees his classmates walking off and without thinking tries to follow them and ends up at the bus stop. In his mind , this would just be another class outing which so common during just a month ago. He steps onto the bus, turns behind.......... no one, the bus whizzes off and he sees the rest of his classmates standing at the bus stop, he gets off at the next bus stop and boards the bus again, seeing his classmates again, in his mind something was immediately amiss, he sensed that something was wrong but dismissed it as being overly sensitive. So he joins his classmates at lunch at macdonalds , after that everyone dispersed.
april 22nd 2004 the boy is crushed .......... the truth hits him , and HITS hard
its was just 6 days after the boys 17th bday
May 8th 2004..... another blow to the stomach.......... movie at tiong bahru plaza , absolutely distraught and lost............... the boy becomes severley disillusioned, earlier he wanted to watch the movie Van hellsing with his classmates and was unaware that he was unwelcome until it was too late..........
May 16th 2004, he walks back to acs primary school feeling extremely vexed, earlier some of his classmates saw him and ran past him as if he didnt exist, the boy sees this but doesnt chase after them......... he simply cannot comprehend what is going on
spending the entire afternoon alone at a mrt station doing flag day makes u think about a lot of things , when he walks back to the mrt station he sees a big group of boys and girls laughing, wearing the same uniform, he relises its his classmates, one of guys his old classmate from sji says hi......... the boy tries to smile and says hi while trugding his heavy feet and hiding the lousy feelings that were bursting out
the boy complains and wails to his parents claiming that it was torture to continue studying in cj, the mum tries to talk sense into the boy who was BLINDED By fear, regret, self-pity,envy, she claims the boy has to hang on. The boy insists on transfering school
mum claims that wont solve the problem and the boy has to at least finish jc 1.
sports day 2004, the boy has a funni feelings around his eye, he goes home and later sees the doctor regarding his eye problems.
One day bfore gp exam, the boy contracts shingles around the eyes and is given 7 days mc, the doc cant believe a 17 yr old guy can be so stressed to that point that nerves were affected aroudn the eyes.
Over the next week, the boy is in a daze and constantly feels tired
....................................july passes, august passes, sept passes, oct and the promos are here
the boy studies and is constantly distracted, simply cant focus, in the end he scraps through the promos with an eeo. In his heart somewhere he wished he had retained so he wouldnt have to go through this shit again, yet he knew this would be incredibly stupid.
te following accounts are based on a true story and events ,
if u want more details ask me.
thats all for now
11:35:00 PM
